Rounding the Corner....

My birthday is this Saturday.  The BIG three ohh.  

So many people have asked me how I am feeling about the event.  And to be honest.... it feels like it's just going to be another day.  I remember thinking when I was younger that 30 was SO old.  I also remember thinking I wouldn't even make it to 30...  But now that it is here... upon me... mere days away.....  it's just one more day to get through.  

It is, however, making me think about my life.  Seriously think about it.  I am looking at my situations... financially, love, living, and am I truly happy with them?  I can't honestly say that I am.  Nothing that I can see in my life is perfect.  Nothing makes me truly happy.  But I am here.  I am alive.  And that is more then I could say about myself even 2 years ago, especially not 12 years ago with the emotional train-wreck I was in high school.

And yet, here I am.  Still no husband, children, or house with a white picket fence.  Still no college diploma or career.  Still renting an apartment with a roommate.  Still living paycheck to paycheck in a job I enjoy but have no real passion for.  But at the same time, I hear about all my friends and old schoolmates and what is happening in their lives, and I wonder, is my life as it is really so bad?

I think when I was in high school and even elementary school, I wanted the life where everything was laid out and set up.  The husband and the 2.5 kids, the dog and cat lounging in the living room.  I was going to be a veterinarian.  However, now that I am older, and wiser, I just can't SEE myself there.  Just like my dreams of being a vet, I saw the reality of the situation and realized it's just not for me.

I have my apartment.  And my kitty.  And my boyfriend.  I have my friends.  And my job.  And at times, I have my health.  I have my freedom to do what I want on the weekends with who I want to be there with.  I have all this, and it is no where near where I THOUGHT I would be by the time I hit 30.  However, now that I have sat down and really thought about it....  I am ok with that.  

My life has been one trial after another.  Not all of them horrible, but the bad ones do out number the good by a lot.  Who out there can say their life was paved with chocolate and ponies?  

So in honor of rounding the corner of the big 30th birthday... I'm getting my friends... and I'm going to Disneyland!!!!